You're my best friend

Hello my Ellie,

It's odd to say that my baby who can't even fully talk yet is my best friend...but you are.  Your big sisters are my best friends too.  You three are the greatest friends I have.  

I spend all day with you.  I get to see all your firsts and new discoveries.  I get to be a part of every moment.  Also, you are the most responsive baby.  You completely get humor.  You are so goofy and make the most sneaky little expressions.  You know a lot more than you probably should at this age.  You crack me up constantly with just one word or sound or look.  

To be honest, there are things going on with my health that worries me, but being with you every day helps me to focus on the good and wonderful things in life.  To be thankful.  To realize how blessed I have been and am.  

You do that.  

You and your sisters give me so much purpose and joy.  Of course there are moments when you all stress me out.  That's just part of life and living with others.  Even so, there are way many more moments that are filled with laughter, joy, and love. 

Just today, you probably made me laugh at least a dozen times...maybe more.  Earlier today, you started crying after I tried to feed you one more bite of food from lunch.  You just had a major meltdown.  You were just crying and crying with snot and tears running down your face.  I held you in my lap facing me with my knees up behind you.  I stared at you crying and kept repeating, "Please calm down...calm down...I'll wait until you calm down."  Then, you huffed while crying and all the snot that was building up in your nose all came out all over your face and mine.  We both looked at one another a bit stunned and unsure of what to make of the situation.  There was a 2-second pause, and then we both cracked up.  We couldn't stop laughing.  The more you laughed, the more I did.  The more I laughed because of you, the more you'd laugh in return.  It went on for a few minutes.  I mean, these are the types of moments we have that just blow me away.  I can't believe how intricate of an interaction I'm having with my 13-month old.  You just make me laugh out loud constantly with your comedic timing and looks.  You do things and look at me in ways that I wouldn't expect from a one-year old. 

I know it's odd to say that your children are your best friends...sure, I can't really tell you all my deepest, darkest secrets and innermost thoughts.  You wouldn't understand it.  Even so, I spend the most time with you.  We laugh together.  We eat together.   We do everything together.  So yes, my girls, especially you lately [since I spend the most time with you], are my dearest and most cherished friends. 

I love you.

The world's worst napper

Haha~  That you are, my dear. 

You used to nap so well.  One 2-3 hour nap in the morning, a short 1 hour nap before going to get your big sisters from school, and then another short 1-2 hour nap before dinnertime. 

Lately, it's a miracle if you get one decent 1-2 hour nap in the entire day.  I keep you up there in your crib for hours while I do housework just so you could have some alone time and get some rest, but you mostly just play around with your blanket. 

It's absolutely nuts how you just can lay around in your crib for up to three hours without falling asleep.  I don't get it.  Both your sisters were great nappers until around 3 years old.  You JUST turned ONE and you're already seemingly giving up naps entirely. 

To be completely honest with you, it's really frustrating to see you on the monitor just rolling and playing around without any interest in falling asleep because I know you need the rest.  You're still so small and need the sleep to grow.  Also, it doesn't give me much peaceful time to get the house in order, cook, and do other things that I can only do when you're not around. 

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE being with you.  It's just that you are so clingy at times and need me around every moment or you start fussing or get into mischief.  So, getting any real work done with you by my side is nearly impossible.  Also, you started this thing where you pull all the laundry down after I've folded it and put it on your head.  It's so adorable but not helpful in getting the task done.  Haha~

I love you.  There's no doubt about that.  I don't know how I would do without you.  You are such a firecracker, always yelling up a storm when you're excited or frustrated, and we call you our little monkey since you act like a cute silly one.  We all adore you so much and can't seem to get enough of you.

Oh, before I forget, you've been taking a few steps on your own here and there for over a month now, but just yesterday you took about 10-12 steps all the way to me from the couch.  You want nothing more than to walk endlessly with me holding just one of your hands (when I hold both I think it makes you feel like you're not in control so you get frustrated, haha).  Every time I want to sit and take a rest from walking, you just break down into tears while arching your back and crumbling to the floor.  You are truly one of a kind.  I can't wait to see and learn more of you with the days to come.